How I Finally Paid Off a Lifetime of Credit Card Debt

debtIn our Money Mic series, we hand over the podium to people with controversial views about money. These are their views, not ours, but we welcome your responses. 

Today, one woman who had been in debt all of her life—to the tune of $100,000—tells us how she got there in the first place, and how she made a pact with herself that helped her pay off her last credit card by age 40.

I’ve been a debtor all my life.

My parents first met at a financial loan office—my dad issued loans, my mom worked in the office. They divorced when I was 10 and my mother was left to raise two daughters in Cincinnati, Ohio on a $20,000 a year salary. Money—or the fact that we didn’t have any—was a constant topic of conversation. My mother turned to credit cards to feed, clothe and house her daughters.

So when I was a 19-year-old freshman at Ohio University, I didn’t see the danger of debt. When a credit card company arrived on campus to sign students up for cards, I grabbed a clipboard, filled out the paperwork and got my first card on the spot. My only income was a campus job that paid minimum wage—$3.85 an hour in 1992. I also had student loans since I was paying my way through college. But I didn’t see the potential trouble of having a credit card of my own. To me, credit meant power.

In my skewed, adolescent logic I decided I would pay for food with cash and everything else with my credit card. I lived in a student dorm and so bought things like a crock-pot with my card, inching closer to my initial $10,000 limit.

By the time I graduated in 1995, with a degree in social work, I had $15,000 in credit card debt and owed $52,000 in student loans. As the first person in my family to graduate from college, I was proud of my accomplishment. I moved to New York City to start my life. That first year, I earned $21,000 working three jobs, one at Old Navy. The credit card company bumped up my limit to $20,000.

Living My 20s in the Red

The debt didn’t worry me. At 22, I decided would be just like my mother and live my life in the red. Looking back on it now, I realize I was rationalizing self-destructive behavior. I was blaming the universe for my own decisions. But I also have compassion for that younger me. I had never had a good, financial role model—I didn’t know another life.

In 1996, I started graduate school at Hunter College in Manhattan, taking out $13,000 in student loans to pay for a Master’s in social work. My 20s became a blur of debt. I was working two or three jobs at a time just to pay my credit card bills. I was juggling multiple credit cards, moving debt whenever I would get a 0% interest teaser offer. By my late 20s, I owed $50,000 in student loans and $25,000 in credit card debt.

RELATED: Which Debts to Pay Off First?

I also smoked, drank too much and gained weight. On top of that, I found myself in a bad marriage (I had even paid for the $8,000 wedding on my credit card). I paid my $1,200 attorney fee for the divorce with a credit card, too. But what difference did another thousand dollars make? I could never live the life I really wanted anyway because I had this albatross hanging around my neck. I was a slave to a big, red number that just kept growing and I didn’t feel able to control it.

  • Elaine

    Thank you for sharing what must be a difficult story. I am impressed with your insight into your situation – how you got there, how you solved it. And it’s heartening to read that not only have you resolved your debt and also still attempt to solve your mom’s problems. That can’t be easy, and must be a frustration that you can’t do more. My daughter is also working towards her master’s degree in social work, and I hope that she finds her career as fulfilling as you have yours.

  • Anamae Ford

    Congratulations! Very inspiring! I also loved the part that after a divorce you found happiness!

  • Gina Lincicum

    You are such an inspiration! I think that many women think that after their 30s they can’t turn it around, but you have–in so many ways!

  • cinnamon

    I never leave comments but I was so inspired by your story. Congratulations, I wish you all the best!

  • http://www.farandfaraway.com/ Megan Leader

    Such an inspiring story! I love that you made a contract with yourself and made it happen while still being generous in helping your mother through a tough time.

  • michwake

    Thank you for sharing. I was lucky to have almost a full ride to college and finished with no student debt. However, I married a spender (I was always good about saving until I met him) and ended up with over $40,000 in credit card debt after my divorce. I kept the debt in 2007 so I wouldn’t have to give him equity from the house. He agreed. Then of course we were hit with the housing bubble and I had negative equity PLUS tons of CC debt. I get little help from my ex for our child so I am doing most of it on my own as a single mom. In 2011 I lost my job and went from $60,000/yr to $40,000. Ugh! Not helping the situation.
    I finally decided to get serious last year about tackling the cards. My boyfriend and I moved from a house we loved, in a prime location in our city to one a mile away. Now we are saving a ton of money but have to deal with getting stuck by trains and being farther away from everything (we used to be able to walk everywhere quickly, now we have to add that mile. I tell my son NO ALL the time now. He is 13 and took a job mowing lawns to buy what he wants. I’m very proud of him. Plus he does work around the house to earn money. He is old enough to know how hard we work for what we have.
    I signed up for a website that tracks all of my credit card debt and bank accounts. So when my paycheck gets deposited I get a friendly reminder that if I put X towards my debt I will save Y in interest or Z in years. It is so nice to track my progress monthly and watch my debt go down about $1000/month. I know many people can’t afford to put that much towards their cards. Hey, I’m doing it on $41,200/yr. I’m also paying for braces for my son. I’m going to need a new car soon but I am looking at options to buy a friend’s car instead of him trading it in. He will get the same amount and gets to help a friend. Win/win. I would LOVE a new car but until the cards are paid off (expectation Dec 2015) there will be no new car or vacations.
    I even contemplated taking a second job for Christmas gifts (plenty of holiday help needed). Then, I realize that if I stick to my budget, two years to pay $40,000 in debt when I make that much is pretty remarkable. I’m already going without a lot. Taking on another job would take me away from my family and friends, one of the few things I can get pleasure in life for free. I don’t want to be totally miserable. My friends and family feel the same. Time is more precious and no one needs to buy gifts, at least anything expensive.
    For the record, I do still save for retirement. My 401k/ IRAs are in the $60,000 range. I do have a small savings and my son has $7500 in a 529. I’m on track according to the calculators, based on what I have and what I am saving to retire with close to $1,000,000. I do not plan on retiring for 30 years so it is doable (I’m 37 now). That is also with conservative returns and my being ok with frugal living.
    Once my cards are paid off I will no longer carry debt. Yes, I will keep cards only with rewards so I can earn perks and pay things off when I get the bill. I do NOT want to carry a balance. These stories really inspire me to keep on track because there IS a light at the end of the tunnel and while I may have to struggle for a couple of years; it isn’t forever and the freedom from guilt and worry will be well worth it.

  • wry

    My takeaway from this story is still that one must earn 85K/y to get out from under this kind of debt – not a realistic prospect for many of us. Sorry to be such a curmudgeon.

    • wry

      Correction – 80K with free rent

      • guest1

        Also, make sure to fall over and get a $51K settlement. What?

        • guest2

          Also, don’t waste $7k on fake ‘medicine’. Spend your money on real healthcare and actual doctors.

    • kgal1298

      I think the takeaway shouldn’t focus on that, but rather the goal to get there. I went from living in a friends car and slowly built up to making over 60K a year. I make that because I have a full time job and work freelance. As well as the fact that I’m recovering for bad college debt. I also pay my own rent and have no family help. The argument is invalid. I think anyone who is determined can make a better living for themselves they just need to set a goal in go for it. Even if you have 3 kids and work at a 7/11 you probably have some sort of skill or passion that can help increase your quality of life.

    • Tati

      or hope to slip and fall on a marble and receive a settlement check for $51k.

    • ksgirl73

      I thought the same thing. Not to mention most of us don’t see a $13000 raise in 3 years. In most places you are lucky if you get a 5% raise.

  • shan

    Very inspirational your quest for financial freedom… I don’t make 85K, live rent free but I know it can be done even with a child in middle school! The pact was a great idea…I hope to share this victory with others in the near future…

  • disqus_xtcgbVajhi

    Although I commend the author for what she is accomplishing, what makes this story feel unattainable for many of the audience is that she got a settlement for a fall and that was a fairly big bailout for her situation.
    She also does not pay rent/mortgage currently and has a higher than average salary. These are all factors that are not average so perhaps if we could have authors who make a more median income (family income of 70k, no settlement or free rent) and especially if it is in a typical suburbia area.
    I’m a high earner and live in NYC however I know most readers don’t likely fall into that area.

    • Emily

      She didn’t have a higher-than-average salary when she started. It’s true- her salary isn’t attainable for everyone. But many people could increase their income- either by pursuing new opportunities, speaking with a supervisor about a path to a raise or promotion, or picking up a side gig. Social work isn’t really known as a high-earning profession, but she hustled. That’s the inspirational part.

      • Yvonne

        But she did’nt have a child!!!!

        • Con

          Maybe she didn’t have a child because she was in debt at such a young age. Having children when you’re burdened with loads of debt is not a good idea. As a 26 year old with $50k in student loan debt and a starting salary of $23k (thankfully, in the last 3 years my salary has risen to $32K, but it’s still a struggle), I know having children is probably years, if not decades away. By the time I pay off my student loans and credit card debt I’ll be at least 40. I may not get to have children due to the poor money decisions I made in my youth, but I’m hustling to fix that, so that I can not only provide for my future children, but teach them financial responsibility.

          • cqbud

            i want to say how happy i am to hear a woman consider not having children, or at least putting it off because there isn’t enough money. i believe all would be parents need to really sit down and think about how much it costs to raise kids before they have them so they can plan and prepare.

          • disqus_xtcgbVajhi

            I’m with you in that quite often people don’t really plan financially before having children. My husband and I are now 30 and have been gearing up for the last couple of years in order to be prepared to start a family by getting bucket list things checked off(travel mostly), saving as much as we can and getting into good physical health. If we had been in a better financial place I would have preferred to have children around 26/27 however I wouldn’t have become as accomplished in my career and finances had that happened.
            I get lectured more often than I should about how there is no good time and things will fall into place, you should have kids while you’re young, etc. I just think that’s awful advice – things will just magically fall into place? Money will just suddenly appear because I had a kid? Being younger will negate any other possible obstacles I will face as a parent? No thank you. I don’t think having children in your early 30s makes you old.
            Granted if someone is waiting until their 50s well that’s extreme and probably unrealistic.

      • disqus_xtcgbVajhi

        I agree that there are ways to increase your income as I did that myself. However, my point was that although articles that discuss how to get out of debt should vary, there needs to be more where the authors are more like the average reader.
        The average reader (my best assumption based on comments below most of these types of articles) wouldn’t likely get a windfall of a substantial amount of money (whether through injury or otherwise) and unfortunately the norm isn’t that you get into more debt for additional education and actually see a real increase in your salary.
        This not meant to take away from what the author has managed to achieve but a comment on why it won’t really speak to the majority of the audience. Always good to have a variety of articles.

  • tammyam

    All testimonials are individual and meant to be inspirational. The idea is not to compare our lives to those who have accomplished these milestones, but to come away with a sense of “can-do.” Everyone’s situation has it’s own idiosyncrasies and circumstances. The point is, this woman made a commitment to herself and accomplished her goal. No if’s, and’s, or but’s about it. She could have felt sorry for herself when she experienced an injury and decide to slip back into old habits, but she remained committed. She had to be flexible and alter her goals to fit the unforeseen circumstances, but she refocused and moved forward. She should be congratulated on reaching her goal and for still helping out her mother. I believe the law of reciprocity is at work here as well. Even though she was focused on helping herself, she still gave to her mother (whom she chose to forgive and just love for who she was). I think when we chose to focus on the positive and stop making excuses and comparing ourselves to everyone else, we can all achieve our goals. We live in a very selfish society of people who are takers and there are many people who feel others should bail them out. I commend her spirit to accept responsibility for her lifestyle choices and resolve to make a better life for herself and those she loves!

    • J Mann

      I agree with your comment. Stop comparing and walk away with this: Get out of debt takes a lot of commitment and hard work, even when occasional windfalls come your way. That’s the theme that applies to all of us.

      Before I made the serious decision to get out of debt 7 months ago, I was earning $45K a year, renting a tiny room, and often eating one meal a day because that’s all I could afford. I decided to go live in my car, work two jobs, apply all extra money towards debt or an emergency fund, and learn survival skills.

      I will pay off my last credit card this month, and then focus on other longer-term loans. Some people could say, “Well, you don’t have any kids, you earn $45K, and you saved a lot by living in your car. That made it easier for you.”

      The point is I hustled. Not every childless person is able to get out of debt, but I used that to my advantage. Not everyone is able to temporarily live in their car, or they don’t do it by choice – but I used my situation to my advantage. After 5 months, I got a new job paying > 50% more than my old job. I didn’t expect that to happen. But even, without the increase in income, I was a hustler.

      I think that’s a major theme we all should take away from this story in this article.

  • SM

    I can relate to this article on some level and find it inspiring. Thank you. I needed to read this today! :-)

  • bibbieann

    This is not a realistic story for the average Joe or Jane. First you go into debt, then more into debt for your education your salary is doubled. & you live rent free with your partner. You should be able to do this. You pay no rent ! & make 85K a yr.!! This is not realistic for us middle Americans trying to scratch. & survive…

    • Con

      It is realistic. With hard work, determination, and diligence, anyone can get out of debt. It takes time, sacrifice and smart decisions. Not an $85k salary. You are in control of your own life. Sure, things happen, unforeseen incidents, but if you start small, you can make big changes. I came from a working class family with bad money habits and ten children to feed, clothe and shelter. My parents worked hard, but were not good with their money. I chose to learn from their mistakes as well as my own mistakes that I made in my early 20′s. It’s all a mind set. If you say “well good for her, but that’s not realistic.” then for you, it never will be.

      I don’t know your situation and am by no means trying to attack you personally for your comment, but I just see too many people on these boards complaining that the stories are unrealistic. People need to own up to their past mistakes and stop repeating them in order to make changes in their lives. It doesn’t matter how much you make, if you see it as impossible to get out of debt, then you are shutting down and putting your head in the sand. It is possible, you just have to work hard at it, it does not come easy.

  • janie

    Thank you for sharing your story. People need to understand that life sometimes takes some serious twists and turns and being irresponsible with credit cards, or not caring or “i’ll pay it later” is very risky business. I would never wish anyone ill health but in retrospect, isn’t it lucky you broke your hip? If you had not, you would still be in debt, so you paid off some of it, but not all of it. Not sure that you learned your lesson, as you were still using your cards for your mom’s needs. Your student loans are still debt, so you aren’t out of the woods yet. I suggest you close all your credit cards pronto!

  • ConservativeCommonSense

    Wow. I’m glad so many are “inspired.” Starts slowly chipping away, which is a good thing, but then gets into trouble and gets a financial windfall most don’t get. Pays some things off and then considers herself debt free with 37k in unsecured debt. Really?

    And the brilliance of the article? Putting $1600 away making less than 1% interest while paying 4.5% percent on her “non-debt” (because she is debt free remember) all while having virtually no bills. Where’s the rest of the cash going?

    Thats what a society based on giving participation awards gives you. An article like this and all the “inspired” people in the comments. Sheesh. Enjoy working on the ACA. With your financial “brilliance” you fit right in.

    • http://summified.com/ Ry L

      My thoughts exactly. I’d be a little more inspired by someone who worked hard to pay off debt (all of it) by frugal living and budgeting.

      I summed up (or rewrote) the article:

      How I Finally Paid Off a Lifetime of Credit Card Debt

      I got hurt, got paid 51K dollars, and happen to live rent-free. The end.

      • Mike Hunt

        Yup, you’re right. She’s one lay-off or one break-up away from being back to her old ways.

      • Guest

        51k is not a lot of money if you havbe to live with an injury that will likely last over her lifetime. She was well on her way to paying off her debt and would have in several years if she hadn’t been injured. Lots of that money went to unreimbursed medical bills that went on her credit card!
        I find these comments mean spirited. it almost as if once you read big money figure, you ignore the reason it apeared and the debt that she want into by not being able to work. It was no big “payday”.

        • http://summified.com/ Ry L

          I’m not discounting her desire to pay off debt, nor her slow progress in doing so. But paying off CCs in one fell swoop and living rent free with a 80K salary to pay off the remainder of her loans in neither debt-free nor inspiring. Hence my agreement with the comment before mine.

      • ksgirl73

        That’s a really good point, she never did point out how she saved or what she gave up to help pay her bills off.

  • Scott W

    I started college and applied for my first credit card in 1992 like the author. It was so simple. Now, at age 40, I’m a lawyer and debt collector. You are in the majority, who got in over your head and chose to think your way out. Keep teaching people how to get out of debt and I will gladly look for alternative work.

    • guyladouche

      You’ve got to be kidding, right? What’s the lesson here that they’re teaching? Make bad financial decisions, live outside your means, rack up debt, then get hurt on the job, receive a workers comp settlement, live rent-free and mortgage-free and STILL not have paid off your debt? Yeah, great lesson…

      It’s sad that debt is such a problem for people in the US, yet there is virtually ZERO education at a young age about money, buying what you need, living on a budget, what having a credit card really means, what credit means, what different types of credit card interest rates mean, etc. Unfortunately most people learn about credit cards and CC debt by racking it up. And I think one of the underlying things in this story which leads to debt is the need/desire for instant-gratification that younger and younger generations seem to have. Want that nice, shiny, new toy? Work and save for it, don’t buy it on credit. And if you can’t do that, then maybe you shouldn’t have that thing.

      I might respect this person’s story a bit more if the moral of the story wasn’t “I made bad financial decisions, and now I’m debt-free”–except she’s not, still with tens of thousands of dollars in debt…

  • Zafod

    I think the people below read a different article than I did.

    You foolishly spent money you didn’t have, and then you claim some sort of success by getting money from a lawsuit, luckily finding a better job, and living rent-free.

    Why not recommend marrying a prince ? You still have debt (student loan is debt) and quite a lot of it. There is no advice in this article that anyone can use. To summarize this article, “Be Lucky”

    • J Mann

      Lots of people get “lucky” when they make a determination to pay off debt (she actually made the decision to pay off debt at least 3 years before getting the settlement). I don’t know if it’s just God’s blessing following around smart choices or if it’s just that we were getting blessed (“lucky”) all along but squandering the financial blessings and didn’t realize it.

      When I made the decision to get out of debt, which I discuss more in a response to someone else, I got small but steady windfalls of money for the first 5 months, then a new job with higher pay. Lots of people who’ve gotten out of debt have that story. It’s not everyone’s story, but it’s not rare either.

  • Tim

    “Now I can finally plan for my future and not just pay for my past.” Great words. Congrats to you. I’m working hard on paying down my own debt, so this article came just at the right time. Thank you!

  • Siobhan

    There are three takeaways from this: 1) that the economy is still ridiculously skewed against women wage earners because 20+ years after finally being the first college graduate in her family, she still made the same amount as her mother in the late 1970s/early 80s – and she is still making that same amount now because 20,000.00 in 1978 had the same buying power as $73,945.57 in 2013 and the Annual inflation over this period was 3.81%.And the take home pay for a single person in NYC grossing 85K is 60K – and that ain’t much after earning two degrees. Also, in social services, there are really only three cities one can even make that kind of salary which is the catch 22 because they are all very expensive to live in Boston, San Fran and NYC. 2) She signed a contract with herself, period. Which means, no more excuses and no more blaming others for retail therapy decisions (insert, buy a house we can’t afford here, or a car, or have a family we can’t financially support) – we could all take a page out of this book – it does not matter how we get there, it is the ends that justify the means. Debate what you will about current salary, settlements, paying or not paying student loans, all irrelevant – what matters is that she got there despite the odds and decided that it was time to be responsible with the money she did receive – rather than add to the debt pile. Finally, 3) no story is as black and white as it seems so draw whatever conclusions you need to that justify your own decisions, hopefully it gets you to the same place of peace that this person has reached.

  • Jessica

    Thank you for sharing your story! I like how you made a contract with yourself to pay down that debt, I think that is actually a really cool idea; it helps keep you accountable

    Good luck with your future financial decisions; far to many people ‘give up’ and just let the debt keep piling up and eventually it hurts them and also their family and friends who try and step into help, often compromising their finances in the process.

    Good job for taking the torch and moving forward!

  • Shirley Francois

    Thank you for sharing your story. However, just like you I used credit cards for many things. I was also beginning to get back on track and paying my bills back. Then I got a setback, I lost my job a year ago to the day and I have not been able to find a full-time job since. I currently going to school for a second master degree which I currently regret doing due to me not able to find fulltime work. I wish that I was able to put aside something towards my bills but with a fixed unemployment income under $200 and rent and food, they begin to add up. I do not see an end to this vicious financial cycle that I have created for myself. I hope to one day to be able to take that trip I have been promising myself and my partner, even for a week or just a weekend.

  • BTDT

    She’s doing it wrong. All her settlement should have gone toward debt, she should not be sending her mom money, and she should not be putting aside that much money for a rainy day until she has fully addressed this storm.

  • SpeedracerSmith

    Not everyone makes $80,000 a year, so it’s tougher for a lot of us to pay down debt. Keep it up though..thanks for sharing.

  • Tina Hawkins

    This story reads like a fairy tale! A job AS a social worker at HOME that pays $80,000 a year? I have been a social worker for over ten years and long to just break 40 thou. I guess it is all in the location. Good for you that you were able to accomplish this. My debt is becoming overwhelming and work two jobs just to not live from pay check to paycheck…

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  • Clara Cho

    Incredible story.. I’ve spent a large part of my short time of my life battling debt as well, and now that I’m finally done with that, I can breathe easier.

    Cutting up your credit cards is step #1. The second step should just be cutting all your expenses down to nothing. I would first look at your insurance costs. They are a huge killer in this country… especially auto. I would look to bring auto insurance payments down to around $25/month (take a look at 4AutoInsuranceQuote).. I would also look to bring your gas/fuel costs down by using an app like GasBuddy (it can help you fill up for less than $20). Once you finally got your spending under control, you’ll realize that you can start paying off your debt FAST.

    • Anonymous

      I would have to ask what kind of insurance you get for $25 a month, nothing good. You really have to wonder if at that price how it’s going to help you if someone hits you.

      Also, no one is filling up their tank for $20 or less. With gas prices constantly rising and discounts taken into affect I seriously doubt you could get anything under $30. You must not be living in the real world with the rest of us.

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    Hello am Heidi, So trustworthy spell caster are still online?i never believed until i saw some post about DR.KIZZEKPE on how he has helped lots of people on the internet.I told him i have had about him on internet and before i told him my problem,He has already told me what i came for and said people had scammed me off my money and added pain to my pain i was so shocked,He just told me that everything will be okay within 48hours,i told him this was what does fake spell caster also told me,He said i should give him a try which i did.Truly am just short of words and over excited for what DR.KIZZEKPE has done for me exactly when the 48hours was completed the call i got was from my lover that left me with pain for over 2years,He said on phone Heidi,can we talk in a sad and shy tone,i was like yes then he came to my house and apologized to me that he was sorry and proposed to me that same day.Thanks to DR.KIZZEKPE,you can contact him on kizzekpespells@outlook.com

    HE IS POWERFUL IN BRINGING BACK LOST LOVE

  • Rose Marylove

    WELCOME TO NOEL BAGITA LOAN HOUSE

    Are you a businessman or woman? You are financially stressed or do

    you need funds to start your own business? Need to settle

    The debt or a loan to pay off your bills or start a nice business? You

    Have a low credit score and you are finding it hard to the credit

    Of the local banks and other financial institutions? Do you need a loan

    or funding for any reason?

    Such as:

    a.) Personal Loan, Business Expansion

    b.) Business Start-up and Education

    c.) Debt Consolidation.

    We offer loans at low interest rate of 2%, and no credit check, you can

    Offer personal loan, debt consolidation loan, venture capital,

    Business loans, education loans, home loans or “loans for any reason!

    We offer any much of loan here in star company

    NOELBAGITALOANHOUSE@HOTMAIL.COM

    FILL THE LOAN FORM FOR DETAILS.

    ===============================

    Borrower’s Full Name:

    Country:

    State:

    Contact Address:

    Contact Cell Phone Number:

    Sex:

    Age:

    Amount Needed As Loan:

    Duration for the Loan:

    Monthly Income:

    Purpose of the Loan:

    Best Regards,

    Mr. Noel Bagita

    Loan Officer/ CEO

    Reply via email: (NOELBAGITALOANHOUSE@HOTMAIL.COM)

  • clara

    I’m janices by name. I live in USA, i want to use this medium to alert all loan seekers to be very careful because there are scammers everywhere.Few months ago I was financially strained, and due to my desperation I was scammed by several online lenders. I had almost lost hope until a friend of mine referred me to a very reliable lender called Rev. John who lend me an unsecured loan of $85,000 under 2hours without any stress. If you are in need of any kind of loan just contact him now via: SANGQIANGCASHLOANS@YAHOO.CO.ZA I‘m using this medium to alert all loan seekers because of the hell I passed through in the hands of those fraudulent lenders. And I don’t wish even my enemy to pass through such hell that I passed through in the hands of those fraudulent online lenders,i will also want you to help me pass this information to others who are also in need of a loan once you have also receive your loan from Rev. John , i pray that God should give him long life.

    God bless him forever.m